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Sticks and stones can break my bones, but words ... will ruin our relationship. Have you ever put off discussing a difficult topic with your partner, because it will inevitably…

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It’s time to get married – public opinion requires!

I remembered for some reason a long-standing announcement in a newspaper of acquaintances (then they just appeared and were a curiosity): “A stupid, trusting woman with children and problems wants to love and be loved.” One phrase, but how much is said! It is only strange that she did not write about marriage …

“Already married, unbearable” – I remember how in the Russian language lessons the girls and I giggled at this phrase, but remembered these spelling exceptions to the rules for life. It was funny in childhood, and now this phrase has become almost a lifestyle for the female half of humanity.

Marriage is one of the most relevant topics at women’s trainings, at club meetings, in glossy magazines … To go out or not? When to go out? Who to marry? Wait for suggestions or act on your own? .. This list of questions goes on forever. And where to find the answers?

The train of thought of my friend will help us figure this out. Maybe someone recognizes herself in her or finds something close …

Monologue of the warrior princess. Or just a princess …
With whom I only did not discuss this topic, but I didn’t get a step closer to the goal, and it doesn’t get any easier from talking. I myself already know who will say what. Girlfriends-bachelors will definitely pronounce the coveted phrase “All men goats.” Mom will look with sadness, with her whole appearance she will remind that she is no longer young, but will add aloud: “I’ve raised two children in your years. Will I wait for my grandchildren? ”

You walk along the street – towards, as luck would have it, you come across couples in love. And the representative of the stronger sex with whom I occasionally meet, in those rare hours when we are at home together, you can’t stretch further than the kitchen, you can’t tear it from the TV. He even manages to “solve work issues” at dinner. He has business, a lot of business.

We have been dating for a long time, and to the question “Will you marry me?” He replies: “Let’s talk about this later.” When later? Where to later? And from this the thought of marriage buzzes in my head, like an annoying fly.

The girlfriends who managed to get married advise differently – both dating sites and fortune-teller fortunetellers, to be more decisive, take everything into their own hands and take him to the registry office, declare, in the end, that I’m pregnant … I’m even for training went about how to get married. The goal learned to formulate correctly – specific, relevant, accurate in time – and even developed a whole strategy for its implementation, but something inside me protests against this method …

I haven’t dreamed so since childhood! She dreamed that everything would be like in a movie: he would ask for my hand, put a treasured ring on my finger … And all this he himself, and not me, like a bull-calf, I will pull on a rope under the crown. I do not want to be a warrior princess, I want to be just a princess!

So stop it! And then after such thoughts I’ll tell him everything, we will part, and generally remain alone …

Afflicting illusion
Familiar reasoning? It is becoming increasingly difficult for us women to be true women. We work with men on an equal footing, and given that no one has freed us from domestic duties, it turns out that we also have two shifts, two fronts. We also strive to make all decisions on our own – “You can’t get from them!” Although we, Ukrainians, this happened historically, since the time of the Zaporizhzhya Sich, when men went “for free”, and women showed courage — and they did all the work and did man’s work, and they made decisions and met them tired, hungry, without trophies …

We are becoming stronger and more enduring, and men are losing ground. Of course, not all! But where are they, these courageous men? Why is it so hard for our woman to meet her strong man? Or maybe this is generally impossible? There cannot be two leaders in a pack. So now, women pretend to be silly, weak, naive?
There is no point in figuring out who is right, who is to blame. We started the struggle for equality, they “let it happen” to him. But there is no equality and cannot be. We are different and unique. And only in unity is it possible to create something more than what we can separately.

There are good wise words: “The strength of a woman is in her weakness.” Eastern teachings about man tell us that in each of us there is a feminine and masculine principle – “Yin” and “Yang.” When a woman conducts “military” activities, she activates her masculine beginning (Yang) – to win promotion, “build” subordinates, successfully negotiate, plan, organize, control … And only the appearance of the woman remains, and her she replaces the essence of male actions. Everything is going well, career succeeds, enough money, but there is no feeling of happiness and I want to cry … There is no one to complain. Because they’ll say: “Mad with fat! What more do you need? Still there. ” And the feminine, which is pushed into the farthest corner of the soul, wants to live! To live fully, with all the colors of feelings and emotions, he wants to love and be truly loved. And it seems that if you just get married, a miracle will happen and suddenly all this will happen.

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